Wow. It is surreal to think another year has come and gone and we still miss our little boy as much as we did in the beginning. We have moved on but our hearts will never be whole. We long to be a complete family here on earth. We watch Colten, Aubrey, and Claire and think about how blessed we are but it doesn't stop us from wanting more. Longing for more.
Our grief has been a journey for the past nine years and as each year comes and goes we know that there will never be a day when we don't long for you as much as we did those first few days.
We get up in the morning and function but a day does not come and go without having you in our thoughts at least once. A day does not go by without me thinking about what our life would be like having you here on earth too.
It breaks my heart that your siblings know so much about death at such young ages but at the same time I am forever grateful for the connection you still have with them. For the random comments from Claire about the shadowbox hanging in our room. For the connections where they randomly mention how much they miss your or when they tell us how you got them to earth safely. Our hearts break a little every time we hear these things but at the same time I am so grateful because they have not forgotten you.
I am grateful that they long to spend time with you just as much as Justin and I do.
I am grateful because even though you are not here with us are family is not complete without you.
I am thankful for the life lessons you have taught me on being a mother, a wife, a sister, a daughter, a friend. I would not be who I am today if it weren't for you.
I hope you always know how loved you are.
How grateful we are that you are spending your days with Jesus, and watching over us.
